||[May. 5th, 2008|09:56 am]
What should I think about with Alysia....Should I remember the times she tried to pull off my wings and torment me? Or all the patience I had. Or how about my first thought at getting married to her? But then there are the good time and having fun with her.. Although the good times are all are speckled with her undying needs, her torment and ignoring any problem I had. I was left alone all the time and until I made myself a part of what she was doing I couldn't see her. Even then she had her duties and I had mine. I was depressed all the time and angry and hurt. Now I feel free but at what cost? Hopefully someday I'll find someone who loves me for me and doesn't make everything about her. Also would be nice to get a non closeted girl. Although after Alysia came out she seemed to think all the girls int he world wanted her... oh well. I'm sad but satisfied about this all. Especially with what she allowed someone to do with a gift she gave me. It's unforgivable, our relationship will never come back. I hope she has fun with her new girl, it won't be me anymore. I wonder how much she tells the new girls to take care of her? It is odd having the new girl and Casey in the room next to us. Then again now I wonder if Alysia even exists. If she does I still want nothing to do with her. If she doesn't Casey is one fucked up individual.